My journey

**Steveg** · 07-23-2009 08:19 PM

Sometimes God moves in powerful ways in peoples lives and there are dramatic conversions. But sometimes he moves slowly. And my story is not one of big changes, but of lots of little nudges, pushes and guidance onto the path he wanted me to travel, however reluctantly at times.

I was brought up a Catholic, went to Catholic schools, but they did not do much for my faith, and by the time I left school I think what little I had had dribbled away and you could say I was a practicing agnostic. I didn’t know whether God existed or not, It was an interesting question, but I was more interested in getting on in life. I went to University in London, but lived at home so I still went to Mass, but only because my parents did.

Then I got married. Still went to Mass, but only because my wife, Frances couldn’t drive and I had to take her. I didn’t go to communion. We were very happy and close, except in the area of God and the Church. It was one of those sticky areas that caused a lot of disagreements and arguments, so we just learnt to avoid talking about it. This went on for about 14 years.

Then in 1982 we got invited to go on a Marriage Encounter Weekend. Marriage Encounter is a movement that runs weekend courses for married couples, to help them grow in their relationship, to share our lives at a deeper level. It sounded interesting and I had been on lots of courses at work. I felt I could handle one more easily. I wasn’t prepared for the power of the weekend and the way it could change our relationship. We learnt to talk openly and deeply about God and the Church, and after a year I went to see a priest I felt I could trust, went to confession and returned to receiving communion.

Over the next few years we got more involved in the parish. We started running a Marriage Preparation course for engaged couples. We set up a Baptism Preparation course. And various other little jobs. We became pillars of the parish and I chugged along spiritually.

In October 1993 A Catholic Charismatic lay community had moved into our parish and were running a prayer meeting every week. Frances started going. I wasn’t very keen on it, it wasn’t my style. It was in two parts, a time of praise and teaching, and then after a tea break, a quieter time of adoration and prayers for healing. As Frances couldn’t drive I used to take her and then pick her up at the tea break. Sometimes I used to stay for some of the second part. Sometimes I went to the first part. But mainly I got known as the man who just came for the tea break!

But then in May 1995 things really started to happen. Friends of ours from Marriage Encounter told us about a course they had been on at the Catholic Marriage Centre in Wales. They were so enthusiastic we decided to go on it as well. It was called Growing Together, and we felt a need to grow closer together in our spiritual lives. We wanted to share more together, not that either of us had much to share spiritually at that stage. But at the end of it we knelt down in the little Oratory there, before the tabernacle, and committed our lives to Jesus. I don’t think either of understood what we were saying, but God didn’t need another opening, and he quickly started us on the path he wanted us to follow, although we did not realise that.

Our parish priest suggested I went on the CCRS course, the Catholic Certificate in Religious Studies, a modular course spread over two or three years, which I started in the September, and which Frances later took as well.

Then Frances found a Spiritual Director, and later I found one as well (an Anglican priest), poor man, he found it very hard work to get me praying with any regularity. I was always so busy. By this time I was on the edge of the City of London, and a friend, who worked in the City, invited me to go along to the lunchtime service run at St. Helen’s in Bishopsgate, an Anglican Evangelical church. Here I found some good Bible teaching.

In January 1997 my Spiritual Director suggested I go on a retreat or a Life in Spirit Seminar. As it happened (!) the prayer group was starting one the following week.

Then in October 1998 we joined the community that ran the prayer meeting we attended.

But that’s another story.