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TwoElevenTwelve

Why Purity?!

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by
titus212
on 03-30-2009 at 04:55 AM (936 Views)
This is the question I have been trying to find an answer to for the longest time, and have yet to grasp as far as the Biblical model as presented by Paul in 1 Corinthians.

In Hebrews, the writer warns, "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral." (Vs. 4) But what happens to those, who may NEVER have a marriage bed? Paul urges purity in 1 Corinthians:

"The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body." 6:13b

"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body." 6:18

I want the same thing Paul wanted when he said, "Everything is permissible for me"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible for me"—but I will not be mastered by anything." 6:12. I do NOT want to be mastered by pornography, and yet I seem to find the truth in what was written in Romans: "What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?". I am NOT dead TO sin, but dead IN it, as I have continued to give in to the temptation of lust and my master, pornography. I don't believe I am, yet, free.

Now, what does the Bible say about sex and the single individual? Paul devotes most of chapter 7 of 1 Corinthians speaking about it:

"It is good for a man not to marry. But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband." 7:1b-2

"Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion." 7:8-9

In both of these passages, Paul urges singleness, but gives the exception, a reason for marriage. What of the benefits of singleness?

"I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord." 7:32-35

Concern for the affairs of the Lord, and pleasing the Lord. But is this enough of a reason to motivate someone to pursue purity in this day and age? I wish it were so, with me. Jesus said, "You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." (Matthew 5:27-28 NIV) which can include pornography, and of which I am gulity of, even as of late. Singleness has been described as a gift, but it is one gift that I do NOT really want. I want to be a husband and a father, but looking at myself, it does not seem possible. So, again I ask, "Why Purity?"

Anyone who wants to give some insights or encouragements or whatever, please, give your comments. Thanks.

Varlen (The VMan)

Updated 03-30-2009 at 04:58 AM by titus212

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Comments

  1. eddybear - 03-30-2009 01:48 PM
    eddybear's Avatar
    Thank you for your honesty about your ongoing struggles, and trusting us lot enough to open up. Far better than whitewashing over problems and pretending everything is fine. Some thoughts on what you have written, in a random order as they come to me:

    1. Hebrews 12:4 says "In your struggle against sin......". The fact that you are struggling is a sign of your desire to please God, and that is a good thing. Far worse would be if you were to say "I'm sinning, but hey, so what." Read that passage, there are some very encouraging words there.

    2. Later on in that chapter, it says "Without holiness, no-one will see the Lord." Now, that does NOT mean that we have to attain a certain level of holiness in order to be saved, but it does mean if we want to enjoy God's presence in our lives, we need to progress in holiness as he leads us, and throw off those things that disrupt fellowship with him.

    3. What support have you got in your struggle? Alcoholics have AA, drug users have NA, I've no idea whether some sort of similar network exists for what you are struggling with.

    4. Singleness and marriage are both gifts. God gives one to some, and the other to some. I never thought I would get married, I had assumed God would want me to stay single. Wrong! Next Saturday will be the 11th anniversary of my marriage to my my wonderful "Pestypaws". But before I got together with her, God needed to deal with some things in my life (especially self-image issues) that needed prayer and counselling from friends.

    5. Regardless of how you feel, Romans 6 is still true. If you have been baptised into Christ, then you ARE united with him in his death, you DID die to sin, and you ARE a new creation. Have a look at Gal 2:20 , and also Col 3. This last passage is a favourite of mine. Paul reminds them who they are in Christ, then lists lots of bad stuff, and then says "As God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved......". That is who you are, V., in Christ. Hold onto that, especially when you stumble. Because that ain't gonna change. Ever.
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  2. Wabco - 11-12-2009 05:00 PM
    Wabco's Avatar
    when God looks at you Varlyn He sees a pure child of God.

    without sounding trite (I hope I dont) we all have sins that trip us up and God knows that.
    Whether the sin is hating someone at work, or weakness of the flesh, God has forgiven it.
    I pray that you will really know that you are forgiven and loved.
    I believe only from that standpoint can we begin to change.
    I was hard on myself this past year for not "getting over" my past...it is complicated...but recently I realised that I should not feel guilty for getting tripped up over this.
    God knows that we will sin. He knows all the sins of everyone. The difference is that alot of people are not christians so when He sees them sinning He cannot call them His own. try not to dwell on your failures (or perceived failures) You have a lot to give and alot of good points.
    God has called you to be His Son for a reason.

    Finally, I feel that perhaps there is a deep seated reason for your struggles.
    Perhaps (I may be wrong) you would be wise to look into yourself prayerfully and ask yourself what you feel you are lacking that the flesh can replace. this can be any sort of "addiction" to food or pleasure.
    Why do you want to comfort / gratify yourself in this way?...perhaps this is more than the natural urges that are not being fulfilled by sex in marriage.
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